Much of the time, your toddler will have many more spoons than you do. They have boundless energy and so much enthusiasm. The day gets longer as they get older, with fewer naps for respite. Instead of getting two or three periods of downtime a day, you may be down to one or even none at all.
Filling the days can be such a challenge. I’m often torn between finding the energy to take baba out to pass the time quicker, or staying at home which requires less energy but more resourcefulness. If we’re having a day at home, we have to find activities to keep us busy all day. All day. Which starts before 7am and ends sometime after 6pm.
This applies whether I’m having a good health day or not. Whether I’m having a flare up or not. Whether I’m experiencing cramps or not.
So I’ve been thinking about how to pass the days. Activities that require little energy and effort. Activities to preserve as many spoons as possible, so that I can enjoy my time with my little girl.
Perhaps some of these ideas might help you too. If you’ve got any other suggestions, you can comment below, or get in touch with me here.
Low spoon ideas for you and your toddler
1. Bake cupcakes
The other day, at my wit’s end for what to do with my daughter to get to the end of the day, I decided to do something I used to dream of. I got out some flour, sugar, butter and eggs. I turned a chair around against the counter. We washed our hands, put on aprons and very slowly, very gently made simple cupcakes. I got baba to put the cases in the cupcake tin and help with mixing. She loved watching me weigh and measure ingredients. We scoopped mix into cases together and then stepped out for 10 minutes of fresh air in the garden while they baked. It was a lovely parenting moment. I baked with my mother and grandmother and now I get to bake with my daughter.
2. Set up a cosy reading area
When my baba wants to read, she’ll grab a book and pat my lap. She wants to sit with me and turn the pages as I read. Sometimes, I forget to enjoy these quiet moments as much as I should. We have a reading corner in her nursery with a comfy chair and bookcase. You could use a sofa, a pile of cushions, your bed. Whatever works to keep you and your child(ren) calm and together. Perhaps they’ll even use the space independently while you rest nearby.
3. Mess free crafts
This is one I struggle with. I find the easiest craft is to provide paper and crayons. This has resulted in the table being a little bit more colourful than it used to be though.
You could try art with felt shapes that your child can move around the page. You could try some basic origami perhaps with slightly older children. You could make a collage with leaves and petals from outside, or with cut outs from leaflets and magazines or boxes.
4. Water play
You could use any kind of plastic container for this: we have some trays from IKEA that work well, but it could be a bucket, a plastic cooking pot, a ready meal container you’ve cleaned out. I’d put a towel out underneath to minimise the clean up. Let your little one splash the water, scoop and pour it (clean yoghurt pots would work well here). If there is any mess, it’s only water so it will dry.
5.Low energy time outside
If you have a garden, try taking little one outside and just walking around together, noticing the plants, the grass, insects and birds. Listen to sounds together. You could even do some gardening together.
Try gentle walk to the park, around your local streets, to a local shop if you have one near enough. On days you don’t have enough spoons for this, don’t feel bad. But if you can, getting out is refreshing and relaxing.
6. A tea party or picnic
This could be with pretend or real food, indoors or outdoors. If you want a picnic go for low spoon snacks like hummus and breadsticks, veggie sticks, fruit and cheese slices.
7. An any room disco
Most of our dance parties tend to take place in the kitchen while dinner cooks. But they could happen anywhere, at any time. Music can be so relaxing and energising. When you have more spoons, try more upbeat songs and dance together. On a low spoons day, try for some soothing instrumental music or have a sing-a-long.
8. Set up a sensory box
Somehow, all of my toddler’s toys are now accessible to her. This seems like a mistake. If I put some away and rotated them, they’d seem new rather than boring. You could try making a box or back of sensory toys, for example, that just comes out when you really need some rest. Let your child explore the box while you sit near them.
You could include pieces of felt or fabric, cotton wool balls, a small plastic mirror, feathers, a small tin, a ball or two or anything you have lying around you’re happy for them to play with. Just make sure there are no choking hazards or loose parts.
9. Play games
Playing games together can be very low energy and yet grasp their attention for some time. Depending on your child’s age, you might complete shape sorting, a game of snap or a jigsaw. Try asking them to sort building blocks into colours. Or just use the building blocks to create! Sit at a table or on the floor, wherever’s comfy for you.
10. Screen time
It is 100% ok to use screens to entertain your child when you need to. If you’ve only got a handful of spoons to get you through the day, or even if you’re full of energy, you get to choose how and when your child uses TV and other screens. You might watch a lovely film together snuggled under a blanket, or a couple of episodes of their favourite program. Try documentaries (we find David Attenborough ones are good). Let them play on your phone or tablet – the camera is my little one’s favourite, but you could try apps and games designed for toddlers too.
Just don’t feel bad about it. It’s ok and it doesn’t make you a bad parent.
One day at a time
Whatever you do, remember to take it one day at a time. One hour at a time if you need to. Honestly, I think that’s pretty helpful to remember with parenting in general. I often find myself worrying about how I’ll cope tomorrow, or the day after. But all I have to do right now, is get through today.
If these ideas help you, please let me know. If they don’t, please tell me that too! Any other suggestions, you can comment below or get in touch via email.
Spoonfuls of love,
Emma
